^* Headline submitted by Jr. Skulker Carlos Taliaferro
To use the links in this newsletter, you must be connected to the Internet.  PC Eudora users: to see this and other html mail properly you must check the box "Use Microsoft's Viewer" in the "Viewing Mail" options.

http://www.centralofficeonline.com

WebSkulker mentioned this site under their old URL in the 12/10/99 issue.  He got email from the owner that the URL was changed, so it seemed worth mentioning the site again.  Anyone interested in phones should take a look, and as we said last time, the best part of the site is these two RealAudio programs.  They are long, but extremely informative about the old days of electromechanical switching:
http://members.xoom.com/the_co/tdphone.ram
http://members.xoom.com/the_co/tdphone2.ram

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http://www.ellsworthme.org/ringring

Jr. Skulker Frank Wilsey told us about the New England Museum of Telephony which WebSkulker would very much like to visit if he ever gets to Ellsworth, ME.  Be sure to click on all the links, even ones that don't seem interesting, because each page has more pictures of exhibits in the museum.  One can never see too many pictures of old phones and switching equipment.

http://www.hearme.com

http://www.hearme.com/products/voiceicq

http://www.hearme.com/products/voicecreator

HearMe is yet another Internet telephony system that lets you set up an audio connection from one PC to another anywhere in the world.  The interesting thing about this one is that their PC software is self-installing as an Active-X control.  This means that you can invite someone to chat with you over the service, even if they aren't good at downloading and installing software.  One function of the system is to send an HTML-formatted email to a friend inviting them to chat with you.  If they are connected to the Internet at the time they read this email, they will see a live status message saying whether you are logged on to HearMe and available for a chat.  If so, all they need to do is press the "Call Sender" button to download and run the software all set up to connect to you.

HearMe also has an interface with ICQ to make it easy to do voice chats with your ICQ buddies, and an interface for webmasters to chat with people visiting their web sites.  Read about these at the second and third links above.

Thanks to Jr. Skulker Chris Gray for telling us about this.

http://www.half.com

Half.com is a place to buy used books, movies on tape and DVD, music CD's, and video games at no more than half the new price.  Half.com is now a division of eBay and is kind of like an auction site in that you purchase the items from regular people who sign up to sell over this service.  But it is very different from an online auction because the prices are fixed and you make payments by credit card directly to half.com, who then sends the money to the seller.  Even though the merchandise will be shipped by the seller, half.com takes responsibility since they are the one you are paying, and they send the money to the seller only after a delay to make sure the buyer is satisfied.

http://www.nerdsrus.com

http://www.nerdsrus.com/billboard

http://www.nerdsrus.com/nerdiplex

Jr. Skulker Goat Boy told us about the pictures of the billboard at the second link, but WebSkulker backed up and likes the home page even better.  The second link shows what happens when you use Windows to control real-world devices such as electronic billboard displays.  WebSkulker saw an error message like that on a supermarket advertising display, and he saw a ticket machine in a movie theatre that had exited the kiosk application and was sitting there with a Windows desktop showing.  (Yes, of course he played with it.  The touch screen acted like a mouse so it was possible to move the mouse pointer and virtually press the left button.)

The first link gives 50 reasons why he is a nerd, and the third link shows this in pictures.  This guy and his wife have a serious problem, though:  look what they chose as their pets:

http://www.nerdsrus.com/reina
http://www.nerdsrus.com/honk

There's no cat anywhere!

Submitted by Jr. Skulker Ms. 1133

Blond Jokes

A guy is having a drink in a very dark bar. He leans over to the big woman next to him and says: "Do you want to hear a funny blonde joke?" 

The big woman replies: "Well, before you tell me that joke, you should know something. I'm blonde, six feet tall, 210 pounds, and I'm a professional athlete and bodybuilder. Also, the blonde woman sitting next to me is 6'2", weighs 220 pounds and is an ex-professional wrestler. And next to her is a blonde who is 6'5", weighs 245 pounds, and she is a current professional kickboxer. Now, do you still want to tell me that blonde joke?" 

The guy thinks about it a second and says: "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it three times." 

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Q) Why can't a blonde make Kool-Aide?? 

A) She can't figure out how to put the 2 quarts of water into the little package. 

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A neighbor is outside gardening and the blonde next door comes out and checks her mail. A little while later she comes out and checks her mailbox again. 

This continues for half an hour until finally the neighbor walks over to the blonde and asks if she's expecting a package. 

The blond replies, "no, my computer keeps telling me I have mail." 

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A blonde was hired to paint the yellow stripes on the highway. Her first day she painted 10 miles. The second day she only painted 5. Her boss, seeing how she was getting slower decided to give her a day off, thinking that she needed a rest. When she came back the next day, she only painted .5 miles. 

Her now discouraged boss came up to her one day and said, "Excuse me, but why have you been painting less and less each day, even after I gave you a day off?" 

"Simple," the blonde answered, "I've been getting farther away from the paint can!" 

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A woman walks into the doctors office and says, "Doctor I hurt all over."  The doctor says, "That's impossible." 

"No really! Just look, when I touch my arm, ouch! it hurts. 
When I touch my leg, ouch!, it hurts. 
When I touch my head, ouch!, it hurts. 
When I touch my chest, ouch!!, it really hurts." 

The doctor just shakes his head and says, "You're a natural blonde aren't you?"  The woman smiles and says, "Why yes I am. How did you know?" 

The doctor replies, "Because your finger is broken."

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