To lie or keep in hiding, as for some evil reason.  To move or go in a mean, stealthy manner.

Monday October 11, 1999

WebSkulker Newsletter
It's midnight.  Do you know where your skulker is?

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To use the links in this newsletter, you must be connected to the Internet.  PC Eudora users: to see this and other html mail properly you must check the box "Use Microsoft's Viewer" in the "Viewing Mail" options.

Jr. Skulkers can run MacOS on their PC!

WebSkulker got complaints from several  jr. skulkers about the 10/8/99 issue which panned the new Apple iMac machines.  One of them (Wes Chester) suggested this site which will remove the Windows operating system from your PC and replace it with Mac OS.  Seriously, try it!  Just click on that link and it will immediately start the process of removing the Windows files and then show the progress of the Mac OS installation and boot.  When done, you will have a Mac desktop with several icons to click on.  Try double-clicking on each one.

Hint:  this works best if you do not touch the mouse while the removal and reinstall phases are running.  Don't be afraid to try it; you can go back to Windows quite easily.

Skulking a free keyboard

Click the "Sign-Up Now" link on the RocketBoard site to get a free keyboard for your PC with an extra row of 18 keys that you can program to bring you directly to your favorite web sites.  WebSkulker signed up for this several weeks ago, but hasn't received it yet so can't tell you more than is explained on the web site.  The point seems to be that the keyboard will come pre-programmed with 18 specific sites that pay advertising money to be on the keyboard, and they are hoping you will keep the original programming and visit those sites.

Skulkers can get into your machine

This one is serious.  Microsoft has published a security alert and fix that applies to all versions of Windows, especially if Office 97 or Office 2000 is installed.  All jr. skulkers running Windows should read about this with the first link and then click on the second link to download the fix.  As usual with any download, remember what folder you put the program in, then go to that folder and run the program to begin the installation.

To summarize the problem, Windows contains a built-in database language called "Jet" that is used by the operating system and some application packages, especially Office applications.  The average user will never hear about Jet because it isn't meant for you to use with your data.  Skulkers have discovered a flaw in Jet that makes it possible to issue operating system commands from inside spreadsheets and word processor documents.  This means, for example, that someone can send you a spreadsheet or document as an email attachment that can cause damage to your PC as soon as you open it.

This is not the same as the "word macro viruses" that you probably know about.  The malicious calls to Jet can be embedded in the document directly, not in a macro, and the standard methods of dealing with word macro viruses will not stop the Jet loopholes.  It is also possible to code a website so that merely by visiting the site, a spreadsheet or document would be run on your machine that could have malicious commands embedded.  What's worse,  according to the gentleman who discovered this flaw, it is possible for someone to send you an email in HTML format (just like this newsletter) which contains embedded calls to Jet.  If you read email with Outlook, Outlook Express, Eudora, or any other email reader that uses the Microsoft HTML renderer, then merely opening an email message could cause commands to be executed on your machine.

All you need to do is download and install the fix from the Microsoft site to take care of this. 

Do you want to keep skulking in 2000?

It's time for you jr. skulkers to start thinking about the Y2K problem and how it might affect your PC.  This looks like a pretty good way to do it: is offering a free (after rebate) copy of Norton's Y2K Survival Kit if you purchase it by October 30.  Click on the above link and scroll down to read about the product.  Notice that there are two versions that are identical except for the packaging or lack thereof.  The first, right next to the picture of the product box, is the downloadable version which doesn't actually come with a box.  You add the product to your shopping cart, pay for it, then you will be told how to download it and install it on your PC.  Nothing will be shipped to you.  This version costs $19.99 with a mail-in rebate for the entire amount, so it is free.

To get your rebate, click here:
and scroll down to see the coupon and instructions.

This made WebSkulker laugh

Submitted by Jr. Skulker Michael Cohen:


What do wives and proctologists have in common?
They always have to deal with a pain in the ass.

What's the difference between husbands and prisoners?
Prisoners complain behind bars. Husbands complain in them.

When does a man feel like watering the garden?
After having a six pack.

What's the difference between a happy marriage and a fairy tale?
A fairy tales happens at least once upon a time.

What do women and tax forms have in common?
Men love to cheat on them.

What does a married man say after sex?
Don't tell my wife.

What's the best part of marriage?

Why do husbands appreciate hell?
At least there, they know what they did wrong.

What do marriage and Bill Clinton have in common?
They're both a joke.

Remember: The Bible says to "Love thy neighbor," but make sure her husband isn't home first.


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