To lie or keep in hiding, as for some evil reason.  To move or go in a mean, stealthy manner.

Tuesday January 4, 2000

WebSkulker Newsletter
Skulk it to me one more time

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WebSkulker is taking yet another vacation

WebSkulker will be taking a trip to Los Angeles and then on to Las Vegas for the Consumer Electronics Show this weekend.  The next issue of the newsletter will be on Tuesday, January 11.  Yes, WebSkulker knows that some other email newsletters continue to be published when the author is on a trip, but that's because the author writes the newsletter him or herself and therefore can continue publishing during the trip using their notebook computer.  This newsletter, however, is written by a cat who stays home, and WebSkulker is the only one who can understand her dictation.  We are trying to work out a system where she dictates over the phone, but this never seems to work and we suspect that body language must be important to the interpretation process.

This site is run by a company that develops and sells end-to-end  telephone call encryption devices.  The point is to scare you into wanting their products by showing you the legal status of wiretapping all around the world.

Free money for jr. skulkers

You will get $20 totally free simply for signing up with this service.  It is an online bank that offers interest-earning checking accounts with no service charges and mutual fund services.  Instead of paying for an expensive marketing program, they get new banking customers by depositing $20 in all new accounts that you are free to withdraw immediately, and by paying a $10 referral credit to the account of the person who referred you.  Please use the second link to create your account and WebSkulker will get the credit, or if you fill out the form from the main page, be sure to put in "" as the referrer.

After you sign up, the bank will mail you a package with a starting supply of checks and a VISA card that is also an ATM card.  They don't have any ATM's of their own, so you use the card at any ATM with a Plus logo.  The bank that owns the ATM will probably charge you a fee, and will refund these up to $6 per month. 

Jr. Skulker Brad Waite suggested this site, and in appreciation WebSkulker will pay him half of any referral fees.

Skulker training

The author of this site is a jr. skulker who submitted it to us.  The first link is to the main site which offers brief multimedia tutorials on hundreds of different software and Internet topics, and also online technical help.  The second link has four funny videos showing a user's frustration with technical support.

This guy skulks by mail

William Hertes writes funny letters to politicians, companies, and organizations to see how they respond.  The results are often quite amusing.

This made WebSkulker laugh

Submitted by Jr. Skulker Oat Girl

For you scholars, The Washington Post recently had a contest for readers in which they were asked to supply possible alternate meanings for various words. The following were some of the winning entries... 

Abdicate - v., to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

Esplanade - v., to attempt an explanation while drunk.

Flabbergasted - adj., appalled over how much weight you have gained.

Negligent - adj., describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightie.

Lymph - v., to walk with a lisp.

Gargoyle - n., an olive-flavored mouthwash.

Coffee - n., a person who is coughed upon.

Flatulence - n., the emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.

Balderdash - n., a rapidly receding hairline.

Testicle - n., a humorous question on an exam.

Semantics - n., pranks conducted by young men studying for the priesthood, including such things as gluing the pages of the priest's prayer book together just before vespers.

Rectitude - n., the formal, dignified demeanor assumed by a proctologist immediately before he examines you.

Marionettes - n., residents of Washington who have been jerked around by the mayor.

Oyster - n., a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddish expressions.


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