To lie or keep in hiding, as for some evil reason.  To move or go in a mean, stealthy manner.

Friday September 24, 1999

WebSkulker Newsletter
He who skulks last skulks best

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To use the links in this newsletter, you must be connected to the Internet.  PC Eudora users: to see this and other html mail properly you must check the box "Use Microsoft's Viewer" in the "Viewing Mail" options.

Skulkers say the darndest things

In our September 20, 1999 issue we mentioned a site that would give you -- totally free -- two local numbers in Great Britain, one that would accept voice mail messages and one that would accept faxes.  Their system sends the messages and faxes to you as email attachments.  One of the other services that DM Club offers is forwarding your two numbers to local numbers in Great Britain, but we didn't stress this very much because the average jr. skulker is in the U.S. and doesn't have such numbers to forward to.  Jr. skulker Joseph Norton figured out a use for this forwarding feature, although it won't be needed often.  This is for calling toll-free numbers in Great Britain that can't normally be reached from the outside.

You will often see companies in the U.S. giving out their toll free 800 number, but also giving a regular phone number with area code.  This is because it isn't possible to dial most 800 numbers from outside the U.S. (and perhaps Canada, etc.) so giving out their regular number lets companies be reached from overseas.  Now suppose you need to talk to a company in Great Britain, but all you have is their toll free number that is only good in their country.  You log in to the DM Club web site, fill out the form to forward your DM number to the toll free number you want, then call your DM number and get forwarded.  Joseph recommends you do this with your fax number rather than the voice mail one.  If you use the voice number, you must first use the web page form to turn off the voice mail feature.

Skulking inside Windows 98 Second Edition

WebSkulker loves Microsoft and always installs the latest versions of their software as soon as it comes out.  For those jr. skulkers still running the original version of Windows 98, here is some information about the Second Edition and how to upgrade to it for only $19.95.  (This price is for the upgrade from 98 to 98 Second Edition; if you are running Windows 95, you need the ~$90 version of 98 sold in computer stores, but make sure the box is up to date and contains Second Edition.)

As far as WebSkulker knows, the $19.95 upgrade CD is not sold in stores and is only available directly from Microsoft using this link (you want the second product on this page):

This link is the Microsoft home page for Windows 98 and the Second Edition:

This link explains exactly what's new in Second Edition over the original edition of 98:

Finally, this link answers Frequently Asked Questions about the Second Edition:

Learn Microsoft products without needing to skulk

Most jr. skulkers don't realize that Microsoft has hundreds of online seminars and tutorials teaching how to use, install, administer, upgrade, and optimize operating systems and application programs.  These range from beginner classes such as how to apply themes in FrontPage to advanced topics for NT systems administrators.  The link above is a complete list of all online seminars.

Each seminar is a multimedia presentation that plays on your PC.  Most consist of an audio lecture along with slide pictures that change automatically as the narrator speaks, just like a lecture with foils.  A few of the seminars are videos.

Skulking inside stuff to see how it works

Jr. skulker Mark Starr suggested this site, which has an incredible amount of information about everyday objects and how they work.  WebSkulker's favorites are the articles with a series of photos showing details of the insides of products such as:

and this series of inside looks:

Visitors to the site can ask questions.  Only some are answered, but the responses are from experts in the field and are thorough.  There is a Question of the Day and hundreds of archived questions and answers.  Here is a typical response which shows that the total amount of gold ever mined in the history of the world would fit in only the first floor of one of the towers at the World Trade Center, and the total amount of platinum ever mined would fit in the average home:

This made WebSkulker laugh

Contributed by jr. skulker Chris Gray:


1. And your crybaby whiny-assed opinion would be...?

2. Do I look like a people person?

3. This isn't an office .... it's Hell with fluorescent lighting.

4. I started out with nothing and still have most of it left.

5. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.

6. If I throw a stick, will you leave?

7. You!... Off my planet!

8. Does your train of thought have a caboose?

9. Did the aliens forget to remove your anal probe?

10. Errors have been made ..... others will be blamed.

11. A PBS mind in an MTV world.

12. Allow me to introduce my selves.

13. Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.

14. Well, this day was a total waste of makeup.

15. See no evil, hear no evil, date no evil.

16. Are those your eyeballs? I found them in my cleavage.

17. Not all men are annoying .... some are dead.

18. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.

19. A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.

20. Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you haven't fallen asleep yet.

21. Can I trade this job for what's behind Door #1?

22. Too many freaks and not enough circuses.

23. Nice perfume .... must you marinate in it?

24. Chaos, panic, & disorder - my work here is done.

25. How do I set a laser printer to stun?

26. I thought I wanted a career, and it turns out I just wanted a paycheck.


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This newsletter is copyrighted 1999 by The WebSkulker.  You may use any material in this issue for any reason provided that you attribute it to the WebSkulker Newsletter and include the URL to our web site: .